Thursday, May 28, 2009

Bathroom on the brain

Today one of the bathrooms in the library was "out of order". The bathroom was actually blocked off with a piece of caution tape, and if that wasn't enough to deter people, the customary "out of order" sign was also hung. For starters, I would never enter a bathroom that had a caution sticker. Granted, I always enter public restrooms with a certain element of ingrained "caution" (I mean truthfully, you never know what you are going to get), but if there is a sign cautioning me, it must be really awful--or at least that is what I think. 

A number of scenarios entered my mind trying to determine what could have happened that would have caused the closure. My juvenile mind immediately thought of gross things--that someone had...ahem...all over the bathroom. Come on admit it, you probably would have thought about it too, unless unlike me you have better things to do with your life than to wonder why a bathroom was closed--please, don't answer that thought, I'll just assume you do. But then I started to think of other reasons: logical ones, like there was a leak or something was broken; illogical, like there was a body in there (not logical because of the lack of police presence), and then it dawned on me that I will really find any excuse not to work on my final papers, even obsessing about bathroom closures. Are there any other possibilities you can think of for the bathroom closure? Fun times at the library, I know.

Friday, May 8, 2009

The sneeze heard round the theater

I admit that when I get on the bus, the whole swine flu thing enters my mind. And it isn't necessarily the swine flu I am thinking about, but all the germs circulating in that tiny non-ventilated vehicle. My hunch is though, that as long as no one sneezes in my mouth or licks my eye, I'll be okay with a good hand wash after riding.

However, I think others are a little more paranoid cautious. Case in point, Ben and I went and saw a movie the other day (Wolverine), and at some point during the movie I sneezed. If you know me, I sneeze pretty loud, and a lot for that matter (allergies, morning, etc., whatever), but I dutifully covered my mouth with my arm, Ben said "bless you" and I thought all was well in the world until I saw him--One of the other five movie watchers who turned around and gave me a look like I had vomited all over him. It went on for so uncomfortably long that I kind of got the giggles. Ben noticed too, as we discussed what I should have done on the way home. I was thinking an appropriate fake cough right in his ear, probably would have sent him running in panic out of the theater. 

I guess you can't be too naive about the flu, but glaring at an innocent girl with piercing eyes of fiery, while all she wanted to do was look at pretty Hugh Jackman and eat Raisinettes, was a little much. I mean, it's not like I licked his eye or anything.